"Untitled" (2003)

Currently reading - "The Odyssey" by Homer, "Mere Christianity" by C.S. Lewis, and "Ulysses" by James Joyce.

Next Up - "Bobbed Hair and Bathtub Gin" by Marion Meade

I found it!!!! For a while now, I'd regretted losing a poem I'd written back in October 2003. I wrote it in a tiny notebook I had purchased after seeing the movie "Sylvia" with my friend Katie. I surprised myself with what I was capable of writing, and I e-mailed it to Katie. Shortly thereafter, I lost the notebook. A while ago, I asked Katie if she still had that e-mailed copy, but she didn't....Recently, I found a little notebook that I'd been using for other things....I just flipped through the already used pages and found the poem I'd written! I still love it, and I'm surprised that I even wrote it.

So, without further ado:

Untitled (2003)

and there -
the muse has ravaged me and
fucked me from behind

and there -
I'm thrown against the wall
all sense knocked from my mind

and he'll tell me that he loves me
as I'm pressed against the wood
and my skin all lit afire
and he'll feel so very good

and there -
he rips himself from me
and leaves me to my sin

and there -
I feel the emptiness
where passion should have been

and he'll button up his shirt
as he bids me a goodbye
calmly buckling his belt
as he tells me not to cry

and there -
I'm at the desk again
again, my pen's too slight

and there -
my body quivers
as I pretend I can write

and all I do is think of moans
that I cannot release
and then the real world clamors in
and bids me hold my peace

and there -
it sits still orphaned
a child without a room

and there -
it sits, an unused page
as empty as my womb

- Teresa Jusino
October, 2003